Pirates of the Caribbean or When New Shoes Won't Do: An Ode to Colonizing Liberals in the Dominican Republic

Oh, the likes of them,
the likes of them.
Both
southern-bred and
Ivy-fed.
That they'd wed
is no suprise.
And what better gift for the newly-jewelly weds
than their very own
Louisiana Purchase--
due East of Key West.

Their intentions are not
completely "avaricious."
So Moby says
(but he also sunk--perhaps too soon,
and too easily--one million dollars
into this venture).
Oh say can you survey?
What does a white liberal call the colonizing
and subversive nation-building
of a third-world country?
Why, an "artists colony," of course.
Complete with beach-front bungalows
(only 250 available though;
and absolutely not
to be Meired in white
according to Celerie).

Going, going, gone!
For the low low price of $50,000.
That is, if you are of keen intellect,
and socially conscious
and selectively, if not prolifically,
published
and and and
"cash poor."
But, as Boykin says, you must be
most importantly
"clubbable."

Be advised to do as Boykin does
which is:
Do not drink the water,
Do not speak the language (Spanish is a devilish tongue and pidgin isn't even
a "real" language, so why bother?),
Do not empower the native peoples as partners,
but keep them subservient
as ornaments,
and drunk
on the free-flowing kettle drum rum
and the vapors of aspiration.

And when the parent scolds the child for littering,
as parents tend to do
Let the children respond with a hearty, if drunken,
"fuck you."

Oh Missus Celerie Ma'am,
why bother to "slit the throat"
of this terra firma mistress
When you've already cut out
her heart?




--gosh, I still like this one; wrote it months ago after reading about Boykin Curry & Celerie Kemble's development of THOUSANDS of acres in the Dominican Republic for an "artist colony" as reported in the March 20 New Yorker article by Ben McGrath